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Ways to Be More Assertive

Many people in the world are living a dissatisfied life as they do not know how to communicate effectively to get their needs. The main reason for this is that, they are not aware about it. Because of this, they do not know how to express what they really want and how to get their message across. People like this can be found in different areas of our society and this kind of weakness affects us all in many ways that’s why all of us has the responsibility to do something to help on this matter. As one of the many ways to provide solutions to this issue, here are few assertive communication ideas for all of us to learn and practice into action whenever and wherever it is needed. But before you proceed, it is first important to put in mind that not all these techniques work all the time, and that situations also differ in any possible ways.   

Photo: sheerluxe.com/2018/10/04/5-ways-be-more-assertive-office

The first thing one must do is to get in touch with his or her own needs. This means that one must evaluate and know what he or she really wants to get or accomplished to satisfy his or her self in ways not harmful to others. One can also tell what he wants by setting boundaries against possible intrusions by other people; things that could violate her privacy and safety, for example, or anything that contradicts her interests. Determining what are the limitations you have for your physical, emotional, and mental aspects will help you create some sort of protection against discomfort or any disturbances in the future. When people know your boundaries, they cannot treat you badly.

Photo: labmanager.com/management-tips/2016/12/six-signs-you-are-not-assertive-enough-four-ways-to-fix-it

The next is, for you to be understood clearly, be confident and firm when asking about your needs. Of course, in a respectful way. In this manner you can communicate clearly to people. This is also an effective way to project a gesture of consistency and assertion for your stance. However, by doing this you must also not forget to recognize other person’s needs and see things through their perspectives. You must consider others using your empathic self; treating the person with respect and willingness to listen so that it will be easier for you to hear their side as well. In such way, both efforts can result to productive and constructive ending. Remember that it is not always about your interests, but the interests of others should also be considered in the process for all to achieve genuine solution.

Meanwhile, by providing other options, you can allow the other person to cooperate instead of sabotaging it. For example, if you are a leader, let’s say, in a company, providing your staff easy and flexible options instead of offering them rigid demands will enable them to be more creative and resourceful and thus, helpful to the company or the project. Being aggressive or being always tough or strict to the staff will never cultivate healthy harmony inside the company but instead, create an atmosphere of fear and passivity. In whatever situation, providing other people choices, while also being consistent to your needs, will enable you to be assertive while also being considerate and inclusive of others.   

Photo: aleteia.org/2018/01/24/6-ways-to-be-more-assertive-without-being-rude/

For an individual to be effective in getting their needs, the last thing one must do is to keep an attitude of calmness and confidence. In asserting their wants, demands or concerns, people must always respect others and always be humble. No human being is above others, so no one has the right to humiliate or abuse others. Just because you are entitled to do one thing doesn’t mean you are superior to others and you can disrespect others. Being aggressive in expressing your needs will only lead to tensions and stresses and thus, worsen the situation instead of bettering it. That is why, it is always important to just be calm while also being clear and consistent to your concerns.

What do you think?

Written by Alter Picar

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